There’s a lot to wrap your head around in the world these days. From civil wars and elections to Brexits, climate change and the moral failings of intoxicated American swimmers, it’s easy to lose sight of the big picture.
But not today. No, today is as good a time as any to take a step back and remember that Nicolas Cage intends to be buried in a pyramid-shaped tomb in New Orleans.
Photo by Britt Reints via Flickr. (Click to enlarge)
And it’s no ordinary pyramid-shaped tomb either. The Wicker Man star’s final abode is–somewhat controversially–located in the famed St. Louis Cemetery No. 1, just steps away from the eternal resting places of Voodoo Queen Marie Laveau and other historically significant New Orleanians. Cage built the tomb in 2010 after issues with unpaid taxes led to the foreclosure of his other two properties in the city, the French Quarter’s notoriously haunted LaLaurie Mansion and the Garden District’s Our Mother of Perpetual Help Chapel. In delightfully ominous fashion, the nine-foot tall cement structure features a prominent inscription that cryptically reads “Omnia Ab Uno”–Latin for “All From One.”
But why would Nicolas Cage, a well-known Hollywood actor who was born in Los Angeles and currently resides in Las Vegas, do such a thing? What reason does he have to spend eternity in a city that he only briefly called home?
There are many theories.
For starters, it’s not unreasonable to assume that Cage–a man who once took magic mushrooms with his cat and who refuses to eat meat from animals that have what he considers to be undignified sex–would do something like this for the hell of it. After all, weird people do weird things.
Speaking with WGNO in 2014, historian and New Orleans Historic Tours operator Rob Florence summed up some of the speculation, saying, “One of his most famous movies is called ‘National Treasure’, well there’s a picture of a pyramid on the movie poster, but that seems far too simplistic as to why he built this tomb. Another theory is that he prescribes to the beliefs of the Illuminati, that’s what some people have said. I’ve also heard he did it to shelter money inside the tomb too. I’m sure you could fit 3 full-size caskets in here.”
Still, others postulate that Cage chose his tomb’s location on account of its proximity to Laveau’s grave in a last ditch attempt to ward off a curse that may have befallen him while occupying the LaLaurie Mansion. It’s a theory that is only supported by his recent memeification and series of increasingly poor career choices.
Whatever his reasons for building it, the tomb has since become a part of the iconic cemetery’s fabric. In fact, female tourists have turned kissing the grave–and leaving their lipstick prints–into a tradition of its own. If the cruel specter of Death should ever see fit to rob our Earthly realm of the national treasure that is Nic Cage, even the IRS won’t be able to kick him out of this one-of-a-kind New Orleans home.
And now, the bees:
