CARS AND CHICKS
Regarding Earl Stanley. Back in the early 1970s, I was also a drummer (having already been with John Fred and Sam the Sham. I used to take drum lessons from Lil’ Joe Lambert — mentioned in the Stanley article). Anyway, around 1973 Earl Stanley and I shared the same girlfriend (she was much more his girlfriend than mine). Earl had a Wednesday night gig at some dump lounge in Chalmette and was in need of a drummer. The “girlfriend” arranged for me to audition with Earl at his weekend gig — an equally dumpy lounge called Stan’s on Morrison Road and Haynes near the Lakefront Airport. So I audition and Earl tells me that although I am by far the best drummer he has auditioned, he isn’t going to hire me because I am too good looking. He went on to explain that the only reason he plays music is to meet chicks, and that by having me in the band, it would severely hamper his work in that area. I’m not sure if that was true or not, but he did hire a very ugly guy to play drums. Maybe I could get a gig with him now.
Stanley was one of the laziest, unambitious musicians I have ever met, and he recorded some of the neatest crap. As I recall, he had a part time job with the post office because he didn’t want to work more than one minute more than he absolutely had to. His only interests were cars and chicks — I think in that order. He used to have this big ol’ Cadillac that he had metal-flaked himself; it looked like a huge crash helmet going down the street.
And as a sidebar on the King Floyd story: “Groove Me” was initially offered to Cosimo Matassa’s Jazz City Studios (while engineer Skip Godwin was the official owner it was believed that Cosimo was still behind the studio but couldn’t come out of the closet, so to speak, because of his bankruptcy with his previous studio) on spec — they offered them a percentage, and they, in their infinite wisdom, turned it down. It was probably best for Floyd, because given the sound that Jazz City had in those days, they couldn’t match the tight funk sound that Malaco was putting out.
—Joe Sunseri, Raleigh, NC
MISINFORMED
I must say that I am very disappointed with you guys! Michael Patrick Welch’s review of the album October Language by local group Belong may be the most misinformed and lackluster piece of journalism that I have read this year. It’s a damn shame that a group that has garnered so much national praise and press has been slighted this badly in OffBeat. I wonder if Welch even listened to the album more than a couple of times… actually, it was quite obvious by his LAZY review that he only gave the album a cursory listen. Welch is quoted as saying “After 30-seconds of ‘I Never Lose, Never Really,’ you’ll know the entire album”… HUH? Did he even listen to the fourth track or the sixth track? While “I Never Lose” is the blurring, wall of sound type of a track, the fourth and sixth cuts are very wide-open, minimal, spacious and sparse sounding NOTHING like other tracks on the record. He is also quoted as saying “But for now, New Orleans’ only band ever reviewed in The Wire has also never played a local show.” Once again… HUH? Local artists Telefon Tel Aviv and Cash Money Record albums have been reviewed in The Wire multiple times, and more recently locals Chef Menteur have received praise in The Wire. In the future, Welch should get his information straight and actually LISTEN to the albums he is assigned to review.
Welch go back and listen, you may find that there is more to the Belong album than simply “Giant waves of major-key distortion churn and rise and break. Over and over and over. For an entire album.” Dig a little deeper and you may hear one of the most refreshing and creative albums to come out New Orleans in years.
—Trent Appel, New Orleans, LA
Appel quotes Michael Patrick Welch as writing, “After 30 seconds of ‘I Never Lose, Never Really,’ you’ll know the entire album.” In the next line, Welch said, “But haven’t had the experience. Sure, Belong’s processed guitar noise sounds like My Bloody Valentine minus drums and vocals. But this same sparseness makes the music more sprawling, epic and, after a half-hour, way more edgy.” Regarding reviews in The Wire, we appreciate the information and will do better next time.—Ed.
ORIGINAL ST. ROCK
We would like to express our appreciation and delight in the return of Alex Rawls, the Original St. Rock, as an Associate Editor to OffBeat Magazine! We so enjoy his articles, especially the most recent “Band Aid, it is like catching up with friends in the music business. His writing is concise, insightful, and well researched. Welcome back, Alex!
Thank you [Jan Ramsey] and all the staff, the magazine looks better than ever and is very “user friendly.” We are so glad to see you all recovering and helping in the healing process for the musicians and their supports of your wonderful city. We are looking forward to the Jazz Fest edition, the next best thing to being there.
If you ever publish ANYTHING by Leigh Brown of San Antonio, Texas, we will cancel our subscription and take back everything nice we just wrote.
—Martha and Kevin Kelley, Valencia, CA
MAIL EMBARGO
I have not received the April 2006 OffBeat Magazine. I’m sure it is due to the Post Office embargo on “third class” mail. My wife and I are coming to New Orleans mid-June and your magazine is so helpful.
Let’s hope the Post Office works out its thing.
Keep on fighting, you have a great magazine.
—Frank Jaklitsch, Albany, NY
OffBeat Magazine is mailed to all its subscribers “First Class.” The Post Office embargo on “Third Class” mail pertains to deliveries of magazines to 701 zip codes, not to magazines being mailed to other zip codes. Unfortunately, the Postal employees also share this confusion and do not make the effort to determine that unlike other magazines OffBeat is delivered “First Class” and thus not covered by the embargo. This unfortunately has resulted in OffBeat not being delivered or being delivered very late. Although the Post Master General is cognizant of this problem, he too has had difficulty communicating to Postal employees what the embargo covers. This arbitrary embargo was lifted on Monday, May 1, 2006.
UNCONVENTIONAL WISDOM
10 Alternative Ideas to Bring New Orleans Back
Thanks to Katrina and her many accomplices, New Orleans is in a pickle. To escape, we need to think way outside the jar. Like a toothpick in a wind tunnel, conventional wisdom (or a resounding lack there of) will not stand. It’s time for fresh ideas. The following are just a few:
1. Rebuild levees and barrier islands using Mardi Gras beads. Our attics are now filled to the gills with carnival trifles. The extra weight is actually accelerating the rate of subsidence. More so than Mississippi mud, these throws would provide the perfect landfill. Keep in mind, plastic does last forever!
2. Replace streetcars with amphibious landing crafts. Boston has its Duck boats and of course Venice has its gondolas; the Big Soggy, more so than any city, needs buoyant public transportation. Let’s put Higgins boats on the tracks and Lafitte skiffs in the canals. When the next monster enters the Gulf, we’ll just paddle upstream.
3. Use campaign funds for public education. The sick amount of money being spent by candidates could easily stock every school library or even reduce class size. We’re putting the buggy before the mule. The only way we’ll ever have intelligent politicians is if we have well educated voters. (So how do we decide who gets elected? I like the idea of a game show. Political Jeopardy or New Orleans Idol could actually fill city coffers).
4. Provide appropriate and safe “temporary” housing. For the absurd amount the feds are spending on trailers, we could give everyone in the flood zone a fine houseboat. There’d probably be money left over for a waterproof Pod as well. The best habitat for this humanity is definitely one that floats.
5. Legalize everything. From gay marriage to hemp boxers, the Big Sleazy should decriminalize (and tax) all victimless “crimes.” We’ve always been an island of liberalism adrift in a conservative sea, and are fast becoming a Disneyland for drunks. We need to capitalize on what we do well. Poker and absinthe, Storyville and The House of the Rising Sun — laissez les bon temps roulez!
6. Stock the waterways. Supposedly New Orleans has more canal miles than Venice. We need to use them for something other than drainage, a dubious duty at best. These stagnant ditches could be teaming with carp and blanketed with watercress. We could sell the produce and fish in the new farmer’s markets and then use the revenue to maintain flood protection — that’s what I call self-sufficiency.
7. Fill the Dome, not with hurricane refugees, but with water. Next time “The Bowl” starts to fill, we’ll just direct Wood’s pumps toward the giant Poydras Street cistern. If the Romans could do it with the Coliseum, the world’s first multipurpose stadium, we can certainly do it with the Superdome. We could then stage massive synchronized swimming events and/or expand the popular Aquarium of the Americas to include jousting narwhales and Lock Ness monsters, a.k.a. swimming circus elephants.
8. Erect wind farms in the gulf and put water turbines at the Chef and Rigolets. If we can’t stop the storms with our ever-diminishing coastal “speed bumps,” we can at least take advantage of their enormous power. With Entergy threatening to raise rates, we need all the help we can muster.
9. Secede. We’ve always been the redheaded stepchild of the contiguous forty-eight. We definitely don’t belong. I say we cut the cord and go it alone. Besides, why shoot for 50% of oil and gas revenues when we can have it all?
10. Join the Revolution. Castro hasn’t had a hit since Elian Gonzalez. The annexation of the Crescent City would be the ultimate coup. It would also be a feather in Blanco’s departure cap and a thorn in Bush’s groin. As our unofficial slogan already admits, we’re “Third World and proud of it!” Viva Nueva Orleans!
—Folwell Dunbar, New Orleans, LA
ANOTHER YEAR, ANOTHER BEATLE BOB RANT
I am sick and tired of the bands or Jazz Fest officials who think Beatle Bob is cute and give him backstage passes. He can do his gyrations out of sight, out of mind and nobody would care. But when he does his “little limp wrist bug snatcher moves” onstage, it is just way too much. A major annoyance and distraction. There was Angelique Kidjo at Congo Square giving a magnificent performance, dancing and singing, and all of a sudden I see a spastic wrist appear from behind the right speaker. Then another. Then a leg. This was really obnoxious and distracting. Kidjo looked over a few times and did not look amused. Others on the Jazz Fest chat site have mentioned him being onstage in the gospel tent and other places, and nobody on that site is amused by him. Something needs to be done.
He is a major full-of-himself showoff. Yes, he is a big music fan but that does not mean he has to be in the faces of all the other music fans at Jazz Fest.
—Nate Goldshlag, Arlington, MA
